Looking for Me?

Wondering where I am? I've moved! Check out the new blog Waterfalling Up for more updates from our family!

Thursday, May 06, 2010

Gift Giving From Twins


The boys were invited to a birthday party.  It's their first birthday party for a "friend" (they are newly 2, how friendly can they be?)  We ran to the store to get presents and suddenly I was confronted with a huge dilemma.  One gift or two?!  So I left the store without getting anything and asked the lovely people of twitter what they thought I should do.  I had 6 people respond...3 for one present from both boys and 3 for 2 presents from each boy. 

So what's the right thing to do?

There are a few things you should consider when giving gifts from twins:

  1. The age of birthday child.
  2. Your budget.
  3. The nature of the invitation.

Now both boys and Butterfly were invited to this party.  It's a joint birthday for a friend of Butterfly's and the friend's baby brother.  Who happens to be a week younger than my boys.  We are going to a bounce house play place and they are giving us dinner.

In the end, I decided to get the birthday boy 2 presents, one from each of my boys.  What brought me to this decision?  Really it came down to this:

  • If I want people to view my twins as two separate people (and I do), I also need to treat them as two separate people.  
I thought about it from a singleton mom's point of view inviting twins to a party.  If I needed to have a head count of the party goers, I would count the twins as 2 separate people.  Not one.  I would have a gift bag and treats for 2 people, not just one.  The only thing I would probably do for them singularly would be to send the invitation. 

So we'll be headed off to the party this afternoon with 2 gifts for the birthday boy.

What would you do?



  1. Hmm, I give one from all three of my boys. But I also think it depends on the age of the birthday child. I think that frankly kids can't focus on too many gifts at one time - the kids who have parents that give lots of presents PLUS all these friend gifts just set them aside carelessly and go from one to the next. I just don't think young kids can think about too many gifts, which therefore just seems wasteful to me to have to spend too much money when I think the kid just needs a couple good presents. But, if there aren't many kids invited to the party, they may each want one, and when the kids are older and get more excited about presents then they might be better off with two. Or you could think of getting one better present than you would just from one. I don't know - maybe it's just me cause we don't like to get our kids too many gifts. And our house is filling up with too much crap! But I think getting two is very thoughtful of you and whatever you do is fine. I guess my personal feeling is I'd rather have bodies at my party to feel successful rather than presents!

  2. With Aidan's parties, I've noticed only getting one present from a family, no matter how many kids they have. I've never thought that siblings should bring separate presents and I don't think of siblings not as "separate" people. It may be more of an issue with twins. But, I think most people who send out invites only expect one present per family to begin with. I think if it's someone that is a good friend to the boys or someone special to them, then they should each get something for him/her. I think if it's more an acquaintance or a big party, then just one present from both. Otherwise it might get real expensive real quick. Just my two cents! Have fun at the party! That's the important thing anyway.

  3. One present or two, I'd prolly spend the same amount of money either way. I'm more likely to get 2 complimentary presents. Coloring book + smelly markers. Then it's one present but I can wrap them separately. One card, though...unless it was homemade cards. I doubt the twins would know who gave which present to the birthday kid. I wouldn't stress about it much.

    When you invite kids to your twins' birthday party, do you expect each kid to bring 2 presents?

  4. I tell my kids how much they can spend and whatever fits into the budget is what the birthday kid gets. When it's the little boy I watch all 3 girls "go in" together to get him something very cool. If 2 of my kids are invited they generally take 2 presents.

  5. Anonymous9:49 PM

    I would do exactly what you did for all of the exact reasons!! The bouncy house charges per child, each child eats (well one of yours probably didnt:), and gets cake. I like the suggestion that they don't cost a lot of money, but I think it is proper:)

    Leslie B.


I long to accomplish a great and noble task, but it is my chief duty to accomplish small tasks as if they were great and noble. --Helen Keller